Cleanliness

If you've ever been to my house, "clean" is probably not the first word to pop into your head.  More often than not there is laundry piled on the couch, toys scattered all over the place, and dirty dishes in the sink.  But I promise you, I clean ALL THE TIME.  Everything in my house has been cleaned, scrubbed, and disinfected within the last three months.  Why?  Because I have kids.  Things that you wouldn't even think about cleaning have been cleaned.  Even things that say they CAN'T be cleaned, have been cleaned.  Is it because I am a raging clean freak?  No.  It is because I have kids.  It is because at some point in the last three months, there has been an outbreak of some kind of contagious illness or another, or a potty-training mishap, or a food fight, or a diaper blowout of biblical proportions, or a coloring-on-the-walls contest.  I have scrubbed more greasy finger prints, pen and pencil marks, and stickers off of surfaces you didn't even know could be scrubbed.  The Magic Eraser and I are best friends.  So if you come over, please understand that underneath the layer of toys, laundry and dishes, deep, deep down, my house is really clean.

P.S. BTW, I am still trying to find a dry cleaner who will take mattresses, couches and arm chairs.  I have used upholstery cleaner on them, and that works ok, but there are some stains that just need to be professionally cleaned.  Any suggestions would be appreciated!

The kids are fighting.

My kids are fighting right now.  Like, right NOW.  And again, NOW.  My two girls fight constantly.  They pinch, hit, yell, push, scream, take each other's things, and occasionally bite.  I hate it.  I've tried everything to make them stop.  I've tried time-outs, spankings, taking things away, and sometimes doing to them what they've done to each other.  Many times I will do just about anything (including turning on the distractor tube called TV), to get some peace and quiet in the house.  And many times I have racked my brain asking myself, "What did I do wrong that has caused them to fight like this?!  If only I never lost my temper with them, they would be more forgiving of each other.  Why don't they love each other?!"

Every once in awhile they will do something so sweet to each other, and I'll find them secretly playing nicely together and loving each other.  It's like they have to hide it from me.  It doesn't help that I am an only child, and so is my husband.  I have no idea what this kind of relationship is supposed to look like.  But I think the moral of the story is that this is NORMAL.  Siblings will fight.  I'm not perfect and neither are my kids.  And that's ok.

All I have to do to reassure myself of their love for each other is separate them.  As soon as Jamie leaves the house without Jessica, they both start asking for and crying for the other one.  They may fight constantly when they are together, but they also can't live without the other one.  Their love for each other is so secure that they can fight like cats and dogs and never doubt their love. 

1Corinthians 13:4-7
 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Introductions

Hello.  My name is Melissa Thompson.  I am a 33 year old wife and mom of three beautiful children.  I also have two part time jobs.  I am also a Christian.  I have a four year old daughter named Jamie, a two year old daughter named Jessica and a three month old son named Jonathan.  We live in an old farm house that sits on six acres outside of Louisville, Kentucky.  We bought the house as a fixer-upper, and have been working on it for the last three-and-a-half years.  So, in essence, we have 4 children, because the house demands at least as much attention and money as my other children.

I decided to start this blog because I believe there are some serious misconceptions among moms these days.  As a mom, I try to do everything I think needs to be done for the health, safety, and well being of my children.  But it seems that these days, the list of "things that need to be done" are constant and overwhelming.  Keep the house clean at all times.  Homeschool your children so they become geniuses.  Grow all your own food in your own garden and make/can/freeze EVERYTHING from scratch.  Use cloth diapers.  That you sew yourself.  From fabric you've woven yourself from thread you've spun yourself from fiber you've harvested yourself from sheep you've raised in your back yard.  Never.  Ever.  Ever.  Let. Your. Child. Watch. TV.  Never loose your temper.  Spout Bible verses in every other sentence so your child becomes a saint.  The list goes on.

Why do we feel the need to tackle this constantly growing, impossible list of things that "must" be done?  Because of facebook, pinterest, twitter, etc.  We see other moms doing these things and, call it competition, call it keeping up with the pinterest mom, call it whatever you want, we feel we must also do them.  And in the running of this crazy race, we have become exhausted.  And now we feel like failures.

What is the best way to debunk these feelings of failure?  By being "real" with one another.  We need to realize our friends are not the super moms we've made them out to be.  We need to introduce some reality into the web to combat all the lies out there.  Let's share and celebrate our weaknesses.  2 Corinthians 11:30 says "If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness."

I started this blog so we can share the realities of motherhood.  My idea was that I would post a "realism" and anyone who wants to share in that reality can comment.  Let's tear down those unrealistic expectations and in the process create a community of Real Moms who have found value and self-worth in the reality of who they are, not in the shadow of who they aren't.